You might wonder why this is even an issue. If You have not been in this position personally, I understand why you would be questioning that this is even an issue. I was just like you at one time and I bet you anything so were some of my listeners before they gave birth the first time. Up until that time, we have our dreams and hopes and fantasies and wishes about how our birth goes. We have read and taken classes and have our birth plan - everything is ready to go. The one thing, the one big thing that I failed to realize, is that there are just some things that are beyond our control. By my second labor, I made my plans. I had my hopes and wishes and dreams. I also added one very important element the second time around though. I had to make myself not hold on to my dreams so closely. Every day I had to tell myself that I will plan for the best and make room for the unknown and unexpected.